A Farewell Salute to Yolos

This is hard to write because I was able to meet Yolos (and Atlantamarie) last October 2022 while vacationing in Georgia and South Carolina.  She has been a member of the Forum since November 19, 2011.  I joined in March 2013.  The Forum was like a family to many of us.  Yolos was always cheering me (and others) on as we posted our puny successes and big failures.  I told her that when I grew up, I wanted to be a gardener like her!

On March 29, 2023, Yolos emailed me that she was going into surgery for stomach cancer.  It was decided that if it had spread, they would stop the surgery.  No chemo or radiation.

Yolos and her daughter, Sally, have been getting everything in order for her final days, and enjoy what days they have together.  Yolos, her daughter Sally, and grandsons Tucker and Clark live together in a 3-generation home in the lovely countryside of Brooks, Georgia.  She is now in hospice and is comfortable.

This is all I am going to write tonight.  I will be writing more.  Sally will be logging on the Forum now, so if anyone wants to add a message, she will be able to read it and share with Yolo when possible.

Yolos, you have been such an inspiration over the years.  I know I can always count on you for good guidance & well thought out opinions.  And I have loved watching your gardens grow.

You will be sorely missed.  Please know that I'm sending gentle hugs to you & your family.

Yolos,

Like many long-standing members, I value your assistance and advice.  You will truly be missed.  I picture your last days as peaceful, comfortable, and basking in the love of your family and friends.

Yolos, I have taken so many prompts, tidbits of wealth, and just life experience from you over the years.  Lord knows this is a struggle garden!

I wish you and your family the love and grace that time will give us.  Know that you will live on, with your family but also in the hearts of many of us who have “known” you!  

Prayers, and hugs from your fan club!  

OMG this is a huge shock, I am so sorry to hear of this.  I may be a (very) new member but even in the short time I've been here it's been clear Yolos was a huge part of this group and yes, she will be sorely missed.

Sending warm thoughts and big hugs from Down Under to all who hold Yolos near and dear.

Yolos, thanks you for sharing your garden over the years with us. I enjoyed seeing what you grew and how you grew it. I want to be like you in having my grandchildren in the garden with me. You have been an inspiration and mentor to many of us. 
Gentle hugs, and  visions of vine ripe tomatoes,
lovingly, Turan

So sorry to hear about Yolos. She was one of who made me feel welcome here, and helped make this forum feel like family. I'm one of many who have learned from her advice. My love and prayers to Yolos and her family.

Yolos always commented on my posts or pics and added her opinion and advice. She never gave up on her garden and I believe she won't give up now. Our prayers are with Yolos and by the Grace of God, we're hoping she will recover and be back in the garden soon.

Dearest Yolos, I was so saddened when sanderson informed me of your health situation. You have been such an inspiration to myself and other members of this forum. We thank you for all that you have done in helping us and sharing your knowledge with us. May you be free from pain and find peace and comfort with your family at your side. My heartfelt prayers are offered up for you and your family.

Yolos, May you be at peace with all as the days grow shorter, may you be comfortable, and may you be surrounded with love. I want you to know how much I appreciate your help on this forum, and that, in your passing, you will have left behind another "family" that also treasures you. Somewhere in my garden is a spot for me to reflect on the gifts you have shared. Thank you so much. You are loved.

From daughter Sally this afternoon:

My sweet momma took her last breath and left us Wednesday… she was met in heaven by my dad, her two brothers, and her mom and dad. The boys and I were so sad to say goodby but we know she’s in a better place. Some things you might not know about her… in high school she was invited to the Olympic trials for tandem flat water kayaking… in college, at Florida State University, she played basketball and softball. She was a female athlete before it was cool to be athletic and a girl. She passed the accounting CPA exam in the first try… at that time only 10% of those who took the test past it on the first try. As she grew older, closer to retirement, she became an avid gardener. She grew all the vegetables we ate. She also grew all of the vegetables my boys ate as babies. My boys and I will forever be who we are today partly because of her!

Sally

Dear Sally, Tucker and Clark,

I know you miss your momma and grandma. We, the members of this Forum, liked and respected her. Consoling when gardens failed, cheering when they succeeded, sharing beautiful photos of her garden.

Lovingly, Sanderson (Sigrid)

Yolos certainly will be missed.  I'm so sorry to read about her passing.

Oh Sally, I'm so sorry to learn that Yolos is not with you any more.   Thank you for sharing those things about her with us, she was obviously a truly remarkable person.

A couple of things I learned years ago after a devastating loss, offered here in case they help you.  I believe that our lost ones send us feathers to communicate with us.  Sometimes they are little, sometimes big, and not every feather you see will be a message from Yolos.  But you will know which ones they are.  You won't even necessarily be thinking of Yolos and you'll see a feather which just seems to 'glow' or 'vibrate' somehow....pick it up, treasure it.  I have dozens, marked with their date and what was going on in my life at the time.  Many were sent to let me know my lost one supported me in whatever difficulty I was bearing around then.

Another thing: one of the Asian cultures, I forget which one, perhaps the Japanese, believe that the spirits of lost ones hitch a ride with butterflies and moths.  I have been visited by many of these creatures, some of which simply would not leave my side no matter how much I tried to bat them away.

I hope these can give you some comfort.

All the very best as you find your new normal without your precious Momma.


[To the rest of you: no, I'm not in general a woo-woo type of person, and I don't believe that the spirits have supernatural strengths, just that they manage to be in the right place at the right time, to hitch a ride on a wing, or to somehow organise a feather to drop in just the right place.  We all have our own beliefs and until we're dead, none of us can really say what is true and what isn't.]

Sally, Tucker & Clark, I'm so sorry.  I really enjoy reading her posts & learning from her wisdom & experience.  She will be greatly missed.

Sally, I can't find the words that can sooth the profound sorrow for your loss. The world is minus another great one, but we must take pause to remind ourselves that your Mom now  resides in the hearts of those of who have treasure her for her time shared with us. Lots of people want a statue, brass plaque, or some monument left behind in their passing, but Yolo's monument is better by far because it resides in the good hearts of those who knew her as a Mother, Grandma, and friend. She will be honored as well as missed.

Just wanting to pay my respects to a remarkable lady and convey my condolences to her family and friends. I am saddened at her passing. While I never interacted directly with Yolos, I have benefitted from her knowledge and advice on the pages of this forum. This is just one of the ways that she will endure and continue to touch people's lives.
There is a quote that I love from "The Little Prince" by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry that soothes me in times of loss.

“In one of those stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing, when you look at the sky at night. And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me. You will always be my friend...I shall not leave you.”

Somehow I miss Yolos farewell thread. Yolos, you were very special to this forum and to me. Your precious comments were alive with joy and so refreshing to me. Thank you for sharing your adventures and advice with us. I also like to express my condolences in this late summer to her family, her friend and the SFG forum friends who loved her very much. Yolos, You are missed.

I miss Yolos.

Me, too.